Do you stop yourself from speaking your mind due to fear of embarrassment or being wrong? Do you have difficulty speaking up and prioritizing your own needs? Do you have a negative self-perception of yourself? These are just a few signs that you might have low self-esteem. Over time, these low self-confidence habits can add up and create a sense of low self-worth that is hard to escape. The good news is, you can overcome low self-esteem, no matter how deep you feel it runs. Today, I’m going to share six simple, yet powerful tips that can help you build self-esteem over time.
1. Use positive affirmations correctly
Positive affirmations such as “I am strong, bold, and confident!” are extremely popular, however, they have one big problem—they tend to make people with low self-esteem feel worse about themselves? Why? Because when our self-esteem is low, lofty declarations such as the one above are just too far removed from our existing beliefs about ourselves. If you don’t feel confident, telling yourself repeatedly that you are won’t magically make you feel confident. Instead, tweak your affirmations to meet yourself where you are. For example, change “I’m strong, bold, and confident!” to “I’m learning to feel more confident in myself!” Adjusting affirmations in this way feel better and give you a motivational boost to keep moving forward.
2. Learn to accept compliments
When we feel bad about ourselves, we tend to reflexively bat away compliments because they make us feel uncomfortable. Set a goal to accept—or at least tolerate—compliments when you receive them, even if they make you feel uneasy. Rather than immediately denying a compliment, train yourself to simply say “thank you” when you receive good feedback. Over time, the impulse to reject compliments will fade, which will also be a positive indication that your self-esteem is improving.
3. Identify your strengths and develop them
Self-esteem is built, block by block, by demonstrating real ability and achievement in areas of our lives that matter to us. If you pride yourself on being a good guitarist, try writing more songs. If you’re a good runner, sign up for a race and train for it. Whatever it is you’re good at—and we’re all good at something—find opportunities or careers that allow you to demonstrate and improve your skills.
4. Take care of your appearance
Our bodies are connected to our spirit and mind, and when you have low self-esteem, it often shows in how you take care of yourself. Small things like picking out something flattering to wear, taking the time to do your makeup, getting a new haircut, or accessorizing an outfit can seem superficial, but there’s no denying that putting a little effort into your appearance makes you stand a little taller and feel a bit more confident. This isn’t about vanity—it’s about learning to value yourself and treating yourself kindly.
5. Get moving
You might be surprised to learn that getting up and moving can have a profound effect on your self-esteem. Exercise creates a sense of both physical and mental empowerment and improves your state of mind by helping you focus on small, achievable goals. By setting small exercise goals and achieving them, you prove to yourself that you can accomplish tasks that you set your mind to.
6. Teach someone something
When you have low self-esteem, it can feel like you’re just not good at anything. I can tell you with absolute certainty, that’s not true! There are things you know how to do well that other people don’t. Maybe you’re excellent at math or great at organizing things. Perhaps you know how to cook a mouth-watering lasagna or create a killer resume. The simple knowledge and skills that you may take for granted could be something that someone else would love to learn. By teaching someone something new, not only are you helping them, but you’re proving to yourself that you possess valuable knowledge that you can share with the world.
Incorporate these six tips into your daily life
These tips work because they slowly, but surely break the negative feedback loop that perpetuates low self-esteem. The more you practice these tips, the better they work, so practice them often for the best results.
As writer and philosopher, Aldous Huxley, said, “There’s only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that’s your own self.”
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